Three Black Spots

Zipadee Yoda, Zipadee Yay

I’ve been told that every book needs to have an arc. A beginning, a middle and an end. What’s the storyline for Yoda’s tale? Where is the book headed to? Does the book have a point? Why have I chosen to write in short chapters? Do the chapters have any link with each other?

Like Seinfeld, this is a story about nothing. There is no point. There is no arc. It’s written in short chapters, because our life with Yoda is all about fabulous vignettes. Things happen. Thoughts occur. We respond. Sometimes we remember. The rest of the time, we eat, sleep, and try to find the most creative ways to fill our waking hours. 

Perhaps the only writing skill I have from my days spent in advertising is short paragraphs and 30 second commercials. When you write for short attention spans, and every consumer seems to have ADD, you’ve got to hit it and get it. Thank God I left the profession before the days of TIVO.

I think that this book will create a whole new genre. Toilet reading. One chapter at a time. No need to remember what you read yesterday, no plot lines or character to carry forward. Nothing to tax the intellect, or aggravate the constitution. Pablum on paper. A sort of Ur-Metamucil, if you will. I had always hoped to make a contribution, but had no idea that this is how it would happen.

Where is this story headed? Tomorrow, that’s where. Every day brings new opportunities for another Yoda story. Someone says something. A headline grabs our attention. Memory is jogged. And we both go Aha. Another chapter.

I think Yoda suspects that something is going on. He has taken to giving me more than my share of affectionate licks. Not too many, no need to get me blasé. Just enough to whet the appetite, and have me asking for more. What a tease. Mina gets a little snippy, and loudly mutters ‘ Just because he’s writing a book about you…’. We are a very competitive family.

My father was a great believer in ‘writing one page a day’. For me, not him. I was tyrannized into writing every single day, till I escaped to boarding school at the age of ten. I began writing this book four weeks after he died last year, so maybe this is the Karmic link. One day, I’ll pay someone a lot of money to figure this out, but not now. First, I have to sell this book.

This book has already given me a major frisson. Every ever so polite rejection letter I have got so far – all of them modeled on the George Costanza ‘ Its not you, its me’ line – address me as Dear Author. I’ve been called many things in my life, but not that.

I’m told that publishers love books that have sequels. The gift that keeps on giving, like Yoda. Fear not, I cant promise 7 books, but there’s more to the Yoda story than this one.

Yoda is now over 14 years old and all the books say that he has more good years left in him. As parents, we pray that we will not outlive our children. As parents of Yoda, we know that we will outlive him, one day. There are no happy endings with pets, but there is a great life to be lived.

Every day at about four in the morning, Yoda wakes up from his place at our feet and makes his way to our pillows. He sticks his furry face next to Mina’s and his rear end near mine. His breath is hot and heavy, there are times when Mina has thought it was me.

A few hours later, when I wake up, he gives me the ole beady eyed look and writ large on his face is the thought ‘Youvegottabekidding’. He’s got it right, he always does. Why wake up when you can be asleep? Not exactly the attitude of the motivated super achiever. But Yoda knows that he can look in the mirror and say ‘ Every day, in every way, I’m getting better and better’, and guess what, he’s right.

And so, Toujours gai my friend, Toujours gai. There’s many a dance left in us, and many a romp through life to be had. And we will sing the song that says it all – Zippadee Yodaa, Zippadee Yay……my oh my what a wonderful day.

The End